“The Start of the Affair” by Fiona Cameron, Paris

LOVE & HEARTBREAK

In the middle of a dinner that was billed as a quiet meal with a distant old family friend, his mood suddenly shifts. He takes on a serious tone: “I dreamt of you last night.” I laugh nervously and he continues: “You were standing on a hill, pregnant, with two children by your side, in front of a huge house that we had built. I wonder if this man is totally out of his mind, should I get the bill and go? Should I tell him that this is totally inappropriate? I’m English, and this is not the way we speak to almost‐strangers. Or am I being uptight, have I misunderstood? He’s only recounting a dream, why be so presumptuous?

I let him carry on. It’s appalling; the wind is blowing in my hair on top of that hill and he’s trying to catch my eye as he tells me the tale. This moment between us is really very awkward. I’m blushing violently, plotting my escape, while some kind of vanity stops me leaving. He seems to enjoy my discomfort – what is he up to? Is this some kind of crazy French romancing or is it just the liberal way people talk over here? It’s 2010, not 1968. What’s he up to? He has a partner and so do I. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself, it’s just a dream. But I’m totally disarmed, totally confused; but already strangely rather charmed